To Trust or To Control?
Sometimes it can be such a cliche to tell someone to “trust God” or to “trust the process” – especially when you’re going through some tumultuous times.
When you have more month than you have money, when your mother is enduring her second battle with breast cancer, when your marriage is going down the drain, when you’re trying to get pregnant and the doctor’s tell you there’s only a 10% chance of that happening, when you just got fired, when you’ve been looking for a job for over 6 months, when you stepped out on faith to build the business of your dreams but no sales are coming in, when you write the book that’s been rejected by 27 publishers, when your car breaks down AGAIN and you have no way to get to work, when your child has been diagnosed with Autism, when you don’t know where your next dollar is coming from, when everyone in your family is at each other’s throats, when the man you thought you were going to marry cheats on you, when the father of your child leaves you, when you find out your 15 year old niece is pregnant, when your son decides to join a gang, when all hell breaks loose in your life…
The LAST thing that you want to do is to have someone tell you to trust God. Or the even more common cliche phrase that we tell each other when we’re bombarded with sour lemons, “Everything happens for a reason.”
Contrary to popular belief people are hurting beyond what you can imagine behind closed doors. The deception of social media is that everyone is getting along fine. What we fail to realize is that people post their highlight reels, not their behind-the-scenes. So while you’re dealing with your own launchpad of problems, the only thing that you can think of is, “Am I the only one?”
Nope, you’re not. Everybody is dealing with something.
I don’t want to underestimate anything that you’re currently facing or what you’ve been through. So it’s fine to feel overwhelmed, hurt, angry, discouraged or frustrated.
Out of those feelings of hurt, anger, confusion, frustration, loneliness, it’s normal to want to find some way to fix the problem. Human beings are wired to want to take the path of least resistance. So all you know is that you have a problem and you want to fix it – by any means necessary.
Have you ever tried to fix a problem that you’re having and it only gets worse? Or nothing seems to change?
You try to fix your man and he only pushes you away further. You try to be the mediator in your family drama and to no avail. You try to do everything in your power to get that promotion at work and you get passed over again. You start making attempts to get pregnant every night and the pregnancy test still comes back negative. You want to change your child but every time you have that talk with him, it goes in one ear and out of the other. Your business isn’t making sales so you try every marketing strategy you know and still nothing.
Well have you actually taken a chance on this whole “trusting God” thing? Is this challenge an opportunity for you to learn to trust God and see Him do what only He can and maybe the more you keep trying to fix it on your own, the more you’re delaying the breakthrough?
While during my quiet time the other night, I felt this rise up in my spirit “Trust me.” I know when God is trying to get a message to me because it’s often repeated. He’ll use people, circumstances, movies, songs, messages at church and anything else to confirm that message in my heart.
As my pastor shared a powerful message on seeing our challenges as opportunities to trust God and see Him work, the tears careened down my cheeks. Why? Because again, God was sending me a clear message to trust Him, that He was on my side and that I could count on Him.
So can you.
One of my biggest problems has been my pride and arrogance until last year. I thought that I knew better than God so I would always try and fix my own problems. I would try to manipulate circumstances in order to get what I want. I wanted to fix my problems and the people around me the way that I saw fit.
It wasn’t until I was faced with a series of events that were too gigantic for me to fight on my own – not that I didn’t try. But I kept fighting in my own ability, limited knowledge and false humility. I realized that I was in a bigger battle that I couldn’t win on my own, and that’s when I started humbly asking God for His help.
There’s a song that I suggest you listen to called “Sometimes It Takes a Mountain” by Gaither Vocal Band. The lyrics of the chorus go “Sometimes it takes a mountain, sometimes a troubled sea. Sometimes it takes a desert, to get a hold of me. Your love is so much stronger, than whatever troubles me. Sometimes it takes a mountain to trust you and believe.”
If there is anything that I know about God is that He loves to get the glory and He loves to be trusted and believed in. He will allow circumstances to arise so that He can come in and do what only He can so that He can get the glory in order for your trust in Him can be strengthened.
The reason why it’s hard to trust God in our challenges or believe that God will really help us is because we don’t really know how much God loves us. We want to control the problem, the people, the circumstances out of fear – the fear of disappointment, pain, rejection or failure.
I see it all that time in how we talk about God. We say that we pray and believe but in the depths of your heart is unbelief or this notion that God can do it but He won’t do it for you or that the God of miracles and breakthroughs is just a story that was made up. As a result, we want to control the problem.
And I get it, I was like that too and still struggle to trust God to work things out on my behalf. But I believe that this very message is God trying to get a hold of you as He uses me to tell you that He sees you, He hears your cry, He’s on your side and you can trust Him for the breakthrough.
His love is far greater than whatever is troubling you. I told you that I wanted to do everything in my own strength and understanding until I was faced with mountains that were far too great for me and it was those things that got my attention that made me realize that I was not in control – only He was.
So if you want to see true victory, it’s time to wave your white flag and surrender. Stop trying to fix it, stop trying to figure it out. Give it to God once and for all and trust Him for your family, job, marriage, relationship, money, home, business, health or any other problem that’s presented itself.
This challenge you’re facing is your opportunity to trust God, let Him do what only He can and just maybe this is the test that you need to pass in order to get to see your victory.
He wants to take the problem and show you His matchless power. Will you let it go into His hands and trust Him? Or will you keep trying to control it?
To trust or to control? That’s the question.